Transformative Honeymoons

I volunteered to help out in the kitchen at my church for the community meal
so I was up pretty early, and I'm glad I offered to help, but I'm feeling kind
of tired and a little depressed -which is odd I normally don't feel depressed
when I'm dressed up - I was walking my dog around Lake Calhoun when I
really noticed it, and really there was no reason for it - I volunteered to help
out a friend and she accused me of hugging her a little too affectionately (it
was a joke, I think, at least I don't think it was "that way")  A guy kissed me
on the cheek and it wasn't meant "that way" or I didn't take it that way, but
it was nice, I thought, and it's been more than a few weeks since I've been
kissed in any way, and really I am trying to correct that situation -and
obviously that's part of what's depressing me, that and I feel really fat

But I talked to several people and actually talked about my situation
and they listened which is really nice - I normally don't talk about
my situation and my problems and that might be part of what triggered
the depression -just thinking about how bad my situation is and not
listening to other people talk about themselves like I normally do
when I socialize, but regardless I am feeling really fat lately
- actually I'm losing fat and gaining muscle tone - but I am not
losing weight and I really need to lose weight
- so I'm going to put it down in big bold letters:

I  AM OFFICIALLY ON A DIET, AND WILL START REPORTING
HOW MUCH WEIGHT I'VE LOST IN EACH POST

I  did lose 50 pounds last year -so I can do it - but it's tough and being unemployed
doesn't help but the time for excuses is over -I am going out for a really big breakfast
monday , and then after that eating one meal per day which along with my workout
schedule (about 3-4 hours per day) should let me lose 1/2 pound per day
(3 pounds per week) -so that's official,
2nd interview on Tuesday (in guy mode)
going to a play with transwoman friend on Wednesday (dressed up of course)
Band practice on Thursday (in guy mode)
Hopefully Dress up and see a drag show on Friday
Saturday - dress up and go to a different play (hopefully as a date, but most likely
with a  transwomen friends in the afternoon)
Church on Sunday then  jam with a guy friend (not a boy friend, but I'll
be dressed up, and I haven't jammed with him in several weeks)

so -I don't know - is that the same old routine or is that change you can believe in?

PS -I couldn't leave this image alone without one more shot at a caption: