Sunday, January 29, 2012

I've been in drab all day today and got some good natured ribbing about
it at church , my favorite the pastor saying (to paraphrase) it's ok if
I come dressed as a girl, dressed as a guy, arrive as a guy leave as a girl...
as l;ong as I come (I actually did that once -and bumped into the pastor
on my way out of course-tres embarrassing! ) Service was good, but I really
felt funny going to service in boy clothes -it's been a little over three months
and I've gone in something feminine every sunday until today.

Anyways my performance went really well and some friends showed up,
and I talked to them after the show, and well how to put this - a couple
of my friends are trans and one looks really pretty and she has a nice smile
and I don't know, she just has a nice smile., she's pretty - maybe I'm just
jealous, it really has nothing to do with who I am or how I feel about
myself or anything I mean she's pretty what the hell, she's pretty and she
came out to see me perform and she has a nice smile and you know?
anyways the performance itself went really well, but it didn't lead to any
new leads, but I like this band and I'm perfectly content to keep playing with
them and having fun and playing in the garage and drinking free beer and
pissing in the bushesb-mucho macho

somedays it really hits home -I'm a very strange person but the performance
went exceptionally well, some friends showed up (YEAH!!!!)  it was
a lot of fun..

this is a neat slideshow:
in no particular order, I liked the Arriana, the Kennedy ,the
Jenny Leee, the Jade, the Aideen ,the Battery ,the Caryis
the Highland Park, the Lazaro the Valenta and the Eloise
my two favorites were the Kennedy and the Aideen
and if I had to pick one I'd say the Aideen was the
prettiest wedding dress

it'll probably be a couple days for the next post -take care.

Saturday, January 28, 2012

So who's seen Albert Nobbs en femme? Me.  It's  pretty good, and it's
refreshing to have two transexual charachters who are fundementally
human beings and not icons of this or that principle or concept or
prejudice but the film is petty long and there's not much emotional
range, I thought - there's one funny scene where Glenn Close
cross-cross-dresses in a gown, but really it's more a charachterr
study of a guy who is deeply private and makes his secretive plans
and is a foolish romantic, and hides his female anaotmy, and
longs to marry a woman and start a tobacco shop -
not your typical Hollywood transexual role ( he doesn't
even murder anyone) anyways I was glad I went and I was
really glad I got dolled up for it so that in some of the slower
spots I could cross my legs, or pull down the hem of my skirt or
stroke my stockings or play around with the 4" heels or comb
my wig or etc.... seriously I liked it but it was pretty long.
I was the only person in the showing I went to who was
cross-dressing, as far as I could tell, but there where some
peopke who I would gues were Lebiasn couples in addition
to the middle aged straight couples that predominated.
Before the movie I went shopping at another mall
(Southdale) and bought a really cute 3 piece outfit -
black pants a ruffled silver/gray top and a black  top
piece over thst, I also bought a couple purses at a
store that's goingout of business -so they were $10 ea.
before that I went to my non=gender therapist and
discussed my employment search and coming out
about being trans to my parents - both my gender therapist
and my non-gender therapist think I should come out to them,
and I don't - at least not right now - and you probalby
disagree with me too - so shut up I'm kidding but it's
complicated anyways the other coming out is coming
out at work and showing up to an interview in a
dress when I'm not evebn full time in real life is
probably a dumb idea, But I do plan on going to
some job fairs in a dress and handing out my resume
at those events and that will be fun!

So I go to church in boy mode tommorrow (for the
first time in three months or so , then I pick up some
theater tickets and run over to the bar for a sound check
then kill a couple hours and play my harmonica with
my band, then, I dunno hang out with anyone who
I know that shows up to see me play - but it'll
be fun - I was supposed to maybe have a date but I never
heard anything back on that so I'm going  to assume
he wouldn't show up anyways, and just
turn in early tonight.

Friday, January 27, 2012

Back when I was active on the D+X institute fantasy forced femminization site
(I wasn't forced of course, but you can be forced if you want to be), anyways
I did a course where I used my photoshopping to make a number of artworks
in the style of some famous woman artists.  It was a lot of fun and about a hundred
times more difficult than it needed to be but I enjoyed the challenge I made for
myself - the artists were Frida (Kahlo), Galizia, O'Keefe, Cassatt,  and Delaunay
I miss being active on the site and I stopped by a bit the other day -I want to
get back on a regular basis as I have more free time again, but anyways there's
an article in the StarTribune about an artist and if you want to take a photo
of yourself as Frida, you can send it to
so I decided why not, and sent that to her - it'd be way cool if I get
a response back,   on a more serious topic,
 I sent out a resume tangentially mentioning my "LGBT-ness"  and
got a response back, I called the guy, but got his voicemail, and I said I'd
email him some additional information, so now
I'm trying to summon up the courage to tell the guy that I want to
go to work for him, but as a woman, or at least to have the option
to show up for work as a woman if I desire (and I'm sure that would
be most of the time, including the interview) -oddly enough I see this
as reducing my chances of getting the job, but I have a job right now,
and I'm well qualified, and he's asking me to explain why my employment
history is as it is, and let's be honest -that is why - so I'll write the response
tomorrow ( I have a session with my non-gender therapist tommorrow and
I'd like to go over how to ophrase this without sounding like an idiot, but
still being clear where I'm coming from -I really genuinely have a lot to
offer them, but they have to accept me as me not as some guy in a cube,
anyways pray for me on this one,
I'm playing my harp in guy mode Sunday and a friend isn't going to be there,
and that sucks -I couldn't tell her that, but this is my blog and I can say it here:
damn, damn damn - anyways I'm just venting, but that sucks,
I got paid, and I've been thinking all week of getting some new skirts -
I'm seeing "Cat on a Hot Tin Roof" next weekend with a friend who
is at about the same stage as me in the transition, but we're both going
to get dressed up and go to dinner and the show, which sounds like
a whole bunch of fun and I want to wear a white skirt, heels (of course)
and a brown blouse, but something pretty -so I want to go shopping tonight,
and tommorrow night I may (but not 100% or even 65% sure, but may be)
meeting an admirer (ie a guy who is interested in men who wear womans clothing)
at a local gay bar Saturday night, -these things never seem to pan out for me
if you've noticed, but I'll get dolled up and who knows...
anyways I'm going to get dressed up and see if I can find a cute white skirt
at the Mall of America tonight.

PS - Ellen sent me an email , she liked my Frida - so that's very fun!

Wednesday, January 25, 2012

I started reading "True Selves - Understanding Transexualism" by Brown &
Rounsley and I just started reading it yesterday, but based on the first 100 pages
I have to admit it's pretty interesting and a lot of ii does seem to reflect
my experiences - I bought it on the reccomendation of my Gender Therapist
as a book to give my straight parents, if I come out.  Im also reading
Linda Mason's "Makleup for Ageless Beauty, which is pretty good too.
I went to a Transsupport group tonight and got dressed up for it,
then I dropped off someone I know at her place, then stopped at the
Church to do my maintence thing then called it a night - yeah I know
I'm boring these days but I have to stretch my money until payday
(Friday) then I'll do a little shopping (but be a little bit more in control )
then the blues band Im in is playing on Sunday so Im not very girly
for this stretch - partly I think I've made some real genuine gsins and
it kind of takes some of the pressure off to change everything,
I mean I am changing things.

Sunday, January 22, 2012

That's the dress I wore to church. Before church I
stopped at a new nearby trans-friendly coffee shop and chatted with
a girl there, then did my volunteer maintenance thing at the church and
attended service - Service was good, but I'm still coughing a bit,so I'm
not 100% over this ( I slept about 12 hours on Saturday -but luckily
I'm about broke so I couldn't afford to go out anyways)
After service I went to the Minnesota Institute of Arts and walked
around for a few hours, and had lunch at the
restraunt there - the meal was really good and they called me Ma'am,
which is always fun - but a day at the art intsitute explains the weird
background for the top image, and I didn't meet anyone or anything.

Actually, because of this stupid cold, I'm probably going to turn on the
TV and fall asleep in about 20 minutes, so good night everyone

Friday, January 20, 2012

I chickened out from going to Gender Therapy in guy mode -I'm still
remembering the last time I went to a Gender Therapist and got the
"Tranvestic Fetish" diagnosis.  My current therapist has never seen
me except as a woman.  I have a couple friends who have never seen me
as a guy and I was talking to a close friend who says she's starting to
forget what I look like as a guy, which is pretty cool, considering how much time
I spend as a guy - but obviously I do spend significant quality time as a woman
now, and last time I went to gender therapy ( a year ago) I wasn't sure sure
I could go out in public in a dress, and hadn't worn one in years -of course
my current therapist is really knowledgeable and isn't a complete horses'
ass like my last therapist was, but I'm still a little cautious about being seen
in guy mode, even though I freely admit I spend a lot more time as a guy
than as a girl and that I just started dressing and going out in public
3 months ago -still, I wanted to be in a dress for therapy (OK I
chickened out -odd that chickening out now means going to a meeting
in a dress and makeup and all, but it's so much more comfortable than
going as a guy when I talk about how I feel),
The session went really well and I was very pleased with the progress
I'm pretty sure there won't be any anxiety attacks this time around, things
are going really well this time.
I had about a half hour before the session, and as it happens the office
for the last therapist is about a half mile away from the office of my new
therapist, so on a whim, I parked in the lot of the old therapist, and walked
up to her office on the third floor, and took a picture of me standing
outside the door en femme, smiling, then I walked back to my truck and
drove over to his office. (it's just a little bit of personal closure -like I said
she's a horses ass, I don't want to deal with her, but that I could walk into
that building calmly and all was kind of nice).
After the session, I went over to the Mall of America, had an Gyro
(OK not great) then I went into a bookstore and bought a book on
makeup for women over 40 and ordered a book for women
who are trans to give to their family members to help explain things
better (my therapist suggest4ed it and yep, I;m thinking of telling
my parents that I'm trans)  after that I went to a womans clothing
store and bought a reallly fun long skirt, then wandered around for
a bit before going home, but it was a fun night.
Thursday I was shaking a cold so I just went home and went to sleep,
and Friday I really, really want to go out, but funds are tight
(I;ve been going out too much and spending too much on woman's clothing)
So I hav e to work tomorrow, but I hope to inexpensively go out in the
afternoon (or evening) on Saturday.

Tuesday, January 17, 2012

So yeh, like the caption says I'm thinking of going to gender therapy tommorrow
in my work clothes instead of dressed up.  Partly I guess I'm trying to show
the other side, my every day male  work life presentation - which is important
if I start seriously looking at if I'm actually giving up anything looking for work
as a woman versus looking for work as a man, considering how awkward and
uncomfortable I can be as a guy.  I was in Macy's trying on a dress that would
look really good at a Job Fair, and I really thought that I look a whole lot
better as a woman, and I looked OK, kind of nice actually, it was the first
time I've really thought in a believable way -why shpuldn't I show up for
an interview as a woman? I look nice this way...(of course I bought it,
then I tried on a couple more and bought a really cute dress for clubbing,
Honestly I don't like the way I look as a guy, at least as a girl I'd
feel I looked good and had the confidence that I'd be genuinely happy
if I got the job,
It might be a while until I'm dr4essed up again , but I think showing upfor the third
gender therapy session as a guy might be the thing to do.

so anyways I'm going to show up dressed as a guy and talk about
interviewing dressed as a girl, if that makes sense

Sunday, January 15, 2012

Saturday is the start of my 4th month going out in public as a woman.
I've been doing this for three months now, and it's been wonderful -but wow
only three months -I mark the time from the second saturday cross-gender
club meeting
back in October - seriously things have changed so much in a lot of ways since then,
especially how I look now - I really need to post some photos of how I look these days,
because even without hormones or diet or anything, just practice with makeup
and learning what to wear and what makeup works for you and what wigs work,and
how to present oneself confidenltly really makes a world of differece in
your being accepted as a woman - I was walking around the Mall of America
today in a brown skirt, red blouse, and brown boots and had just a lovely time.
I bought a couple dresses on sale at Macy's (after trying on several) then went to
a couple stores, finally buying another dress at Nordtrams off the rack (using the
womans fitting room obviously) then sat  down and people watched on a bench
eating a couple pretzel hotdogs - like I said it was wonderful, and I think I look
very good, but do I pass? I know I don't pass 100% -but most people don't
seem to notice anything about me, so I must sort of pass, sort of not pass -the
important point being - I present well enough that it is accepted that I should
be acknowledged as a woman in a public setting and I want to do everything
I can to see that people accept me as a woman when I go out in public places
like this. you definately do not need to pass 100% to go out and enjoy a day
of shopping as a woman, and it is so much fun!
so back on topic - I was late to the cross gender club meeting, but
made up for it by doing a lot of talking and listening, then when the meeting
broke up going into the main bar and talking some more with a couple girls,
and a guy from the church, his partner, friends and family, but with all the
talking I was doing I didn't get to get up and play my harmonica,
which was my objective (that plus attending my 4th monthly meeting in
female attire) -it was fun
Sunday I got dressed up and went to church, had a meal there, talked
to a couple people there, then went over to the
Mall of America ( as I mentioned before) so it was a good day

I am starting to goof off with Photoshop again (see top caption) so I'll start
doing captions  again pretty soon -I'm kind of waiting for "inspiration"
because the old inspiration was fueled by the pent-up desire to be able to be
myself and experience life as a woman, and while I still have a lot of pent up
frustration about not being full-time, I now have a lot of pleasent memories
of experiencing life as a woman (even if only for part of a day here, part
of the day there) and the captions need a new focus - it'll come to me....

Saturday, January 14, 2012

Thursday was a lot of fun, I was dolled up the whole day, and
I went to a couple different thrift stores and bought one dress at one and
a couple more at the other,then I  had a meal at Perkins and the waitress was
very friendly (I've yet to have a bad experience at Perkins when I've
been dressed up).  Because I was running really low on funds (the day before
payday) I decided to go over to the Walker for free thursday (but that is
after 5 pm -ouch, but I was there,so I paid the $10 and went in)
I've gone to the Walker twice now dressed up and it is a) a really
fun place to walk around, b) a wonderful place to go if you
just want to get dressed up and walk around -it's almost as much fun
as shopping at the Mall of America, and very accepting and relaxing.
and c) there's some really interesting artwork to look at
I had a really nice conversation with someone I met there who is now
following this blog (that explains the top "caption"  -Hi Jenn!)
and I want to promote a production she will be in in mid-February
here in the Twin CIties (make your reservations now):

The Naked I: Wide Open

A world premiere play created by 20% Theatre Company Twin Cities,
with the contributions of over 20 local transgender/gender non-conforming artists and allies

so I'm looking forward to that, it sounds interesting

anyways I took Thursday off so I could be dressed up all day and
then go to my second appointment with the gender therapist, but
I was still carrying a little baggage from last night with the "feeling fat"
and some worries about getting a job if I go full-time and all that, so
the session was more real-life issues than gender stuff, but I thought
it was helpful but kind of "one step forward two steps back" in
a way,  It's good to get somethings out in the open and my
concern about weight and making a living are real concerns,
but it did feel like I was going in reverse a bit, -it's only the second
session so patience girl

Friday I had electrolysis (ouch, ouch, ouch) and a long day at work
so I made a fair amount of money Friday actually even after I paid for
the electrolysis I came out ahead by quite a bit
I have to get dressed up now, so take care

Thursday, January 12, 2012


The date didn't go off very well.  As I was getting ready I was feeling really
fat, and I tried on a few things and every thing made me look fat, so I
put on a black dress with some gold trim that I'd worn at the bar before,
but as my date said later that night the dress made me look old, which
it did, but yeh, it was that kind of night. 
I felt really tired driving over but I didn't want to cancel  and make it seem like
I wasn't interested and I thought I'd perk up when I got  to the bar which
I did but I wasn't very talkative, and we sat there and watched the
girls perform (it was the Amateur drag night -that I'd been competing
in and I thought it'd be fun just go and watch - but it made me feel 
old and fat and not very feminine looking and not very outgoing or
interesting, and yeh like I said it was that kind of night) so eventually
my date got up to leave and so I drove her back home,  talked a little in
the car, but it was kind of measured talk, dropped her off at the door
after a kiss in the car, but 'I wasn't feeling romantic, and it's frustrating
I go on a date, finally, with someone I really like and care for, and
it just unravels like that.  I don't know what to make of that.

Wednesday, January 11, 2012

I've got a date in a bit, and rather than get all nervous, I'm playing around with
photoshop effects and watching some tv show about ancient greek warships,
I never said I'm not strange.
It's pretty cold but I want to wear something to show off my legs,
I'd like to go with a gown and sandals, but I'm thinking
pratically I'll probably go with black boots a red leather
skirt and a black blouse - anyways I see my Gender Therapist
tomorrow for the second time, and I have the day off so
i'll spend all day dressed up (yeah!!!) but I probably won't be posting
until Friday (after my electolysis) - hopefully this will be a good
couple of days.

Tuesday, January 10, 2012

so I  just read that Minneapolis-StPaul is the seventh
gayest city in the US, and if you're city is gayer than
mine -wow - it's hard to take the Advocate survey
 remotely seriously, but for trans people who are such
a minority that we don't get surveys, Minneapolis-St Paul
must be number one or up there -it's a very cool place
 to live if you're coming out as trans. 
I'm in boy mode today but four days is too long so I'm
going to get dolled up tomorrow night after work for a date
(and all day thursday - yeah!!)  -but being in boy mode
I actually was goofing around with the new photoshop
book and did an excercise to make a Brokeh Brush which
is how I got the "bubble" effect for the above caption
it's nice to have some time again to take ther dog for a walk,
go to the music store and get a harmonica, learn some
new photshop techniques stuff like that -yesterday in
boy mode was what I am calling my "boys night out"
me (in boy mode) with the guys playing music in a guys
garage with a sportcar up on jacks and beer in a cooler,
pissing outside in the bushes, yeh we got it all,
mucho macho - I was describing it to friend over the
phone and I started laughing when I came up with
"Boys Night Out"-it does sound kind of absurd,and
somedays it feels that way but we're playing music
and that's fun and it's good to be doing guy things
considering how much time I spend as a guy but
when you blow out a reed in your harmonica
because theirs lipstick in it and you're thinking
about the night before and what a pretty skirt you had
on or about the upcoming gender therapy session, it's
hard to be too "mucho macho" - I'm hanging in there.

Sunday, January 8, 2012

I was really excited about playing "Amazing Grace"  at my church,
and it went really, really well.  I am so pleased. It was a lot of fun.
I played the intro solo (key of F) then the Music Director joined
in on  piano playing  a Lorrie Line arrangement,
I added a harmonica accompianment for a passage he did a solo
then after a key change to G I played along for a section and then
he ended the tune and there was a lot of appluase when it was done
and afterwards several people came up to me and said they
really liked it, and I got hugged about 15 times (which is pretty
nice really)  - oh I almost forgot - I was wearing a brown suede
skirt with some realy nice hem details (kind of lace like), tan panythose,
brown leather short boots, with open toes and 4" heels  (they are really
cute) and a dark purple velvet blouse (pretty conservative but still a little girly)
and underneath a full length girdle and a corset.  Toss in  a new wig and
I was feeling really pretty - in fact becasue the weather was so warm,
I figured I really had to get out after the service (and the meeting afterwards)
so I went to Como park and walked around the zoo and garden -
wearing a skirt comfortably this late in January in Minnesota is just
wonderful but I seemed to be the only guy taking advantage of this
stroke of luck, and even the girls weren't wearing skirts -but I was,
and it was nice, and they don't know what they were missing.
Yesterday,  I went out to a local gay bar and sat in for two songs
with a talented local musician, and went with a friend and afterwards
it sort of turned into a date ( or maybe it was always a date, and it
just needed to be made official) anyways nothing earth shaking or
anything like that, but it did  kind of stir up some feelings - so, yeh
I had a good weekend and now it's back to boy mode to pick up
my dog, and get some sleep ( well technically  I sleep in a slip , but
I don't count that as dressing up) ,  Thursday may be the next time
I get dolled up ( yeh 4 days is a long stretch for me) but it will be
a special day and I've kind of low on funds ( I've been shopping too
much, I'll admit it) - so I should be able to handle four straight days
as a guy (ewwww!)

Thursday, January 5, 2012

Last night was the amateur drag finals at the 90's as winner of week 8 ( we'll
gloss over the details, OK) anyways as a winner I was able to compete in the
finals and the other girls were really good.  I put up a good performance but
I don't really see myself as a drag queen, I'm more a musician whose decided
to perform in drag -but many people came up to me and said they really liked
my playing which was nice, and I had a friend show up to support me, and
I'm getting to know some of the people there so it was fun getting to dress up
and look pretty up on stage in front of a good sized crowd, but I wasn't really
competitive to the drag queens who work up the audience and all that,
so like I say it was a lot of fun and I felt kind of pretty and all but I think
I'm done being a drag queen - I;ll still go to drag shows and dress up and
watch as a spectator, just not as a performer.
The bar is starting the whole thing over again so if I do change my mind
I can always enter again, but coming home at 3 in the morning and waking
up at 6 am and then putting in a 10 hour day at work is really tough,
and I've done it for 9 weeks in a row now, and as much fun as it was,
I'm sorry girls but I need to give these 4" heels a rest.
I do want to continue to perform playing my harp in drag, and that
means going to open jams at straight bars, which scares me
but I think I could do it - but it is scary - I am playing really good though
I'll probably start at a couple coffee houses, then a couple straight
bars that are playing the blues, then the ultimate:  make the
weekend drive to Chicago and sit in with some bands there, in drag.
yeh - it's exciting but to really actually do it is kind of scary but that's
the plan.I got a new book over Christmas on photoshop techniques,
so I am going to start doing caps again, and hopefully find time for
the on-site D+X Institute ( a feminizing role play site -it's a lot of fun
but I just haven't had any free time until the last few days)
I have electrolysis tommorrow (it's a slow process) but it's
important, then the weekend yeah!

Tuesday, January 3, 2012

maybe I'm cured - I had Monday off and I didn't  get dressed up,
of course I had planned on spending the day dressed up with a friend
but when I didn't see her Sunday at church I wasn't sure if I should call
or not so I made other plans , and I had spent a lot of money shopping
at the Mall of America Sunday with another friend who is pre-op trans,
anyways, being cured  I spent the day as a guy, and dressed up as a guy
I went to the walmart and bought some makeup and body lotion and razors
and false eye lashes and stuff for the Wednesday drag competion, then
I got a haircut and my eyebrows waxed, then I got my ears pierced
and bought some CD's of female blues sin gers (I've settled on Etta James
version of Houndog in the key of D as the song I'll go with).  I also took the
dog for a couple walks - because I felt I've been neglecting her with the long
hours I've been working.
So back to the ear piercing because I hadn't really researched what all is
involved in an ear piercing - basically I wanted to get my ears peirced so I
could wear something dangly at the drag competition.  Turns out it doesn't
work that way - I wish the girl who did the piercing had told me this before,
not after the piercing because I'm supposed to wear these earings for the next
6 weeks, but clean them witha solution twice a day and rotate them twice
a day.  I had no idea I'd be wearing earings for the next six weeks - but
every one else seems to know that little detail   - in my guy life, I'm really not out
about being gay or trans - well I am and I'm not -I'm not advertizizing it, or at
least I wasn't but I'm getting looks from a lot of people now - and it's like the
earing kind of confirm what they were suspecting I think - it's not that people
are looking at me in a bad way, it's more like I'll be talking and the girl will look
at me and see the earings and smile, so it's not unpleasant just I'm not used
to being so open in guy mode about advertizing that I'm gay, which is
kind of odd, because in girl mode I walk around for hours dressed up and
a lot of people know I'm a guy in a dress (I assume) - so it's odd I'm
so secretive in guy mode and so open in girl mode.

Sunday, January 1, 2012

well this is a good start to the new year - I got dolled up, went to church,
then met a friend and took her shopping again.  We went to the wal-mart,
and I bought a bunch of pantyhose and some tops, then wound up at the
Mall of America and we were there shopping for several hours - I bought
really pretty tops there -so I know what I'm going to wear for the Drag
contest finals this Wednesday.  Today was a fun day.

I spent New Years dancing with a girl whose dress was a lot prettier than my
white skirt, black boots and purple blouse - so it was fun but a little frustrating,
because she was younger and prettier and drunker and more outgoing and her
dress was prettier and all so , well OK I was kind of hoping some guy would hit
on me and that won't happen when you're with a cis-girl who's prettier than you
 (not that I'd actually go home with him or do anything other than flirt a bit,
but still.... )
I was waiting in line for the champagne for the New Year toast and she asked
me who I was with, and after I said I was alone she said I was welcome to join
her and her friends so naturally I did and had a good time , and I did get to give
a dollar tip to one of the performers who's been very nice and supportive of me
in the weekly drag contests, so it was fun to show some support of her performance
(which was excellent of course) there are a few people I bump into during the course
of a night that I've met before, so that's nice - I don't feel so totally an outsider,but
still I am going into the bar alone and leaving alone, and the boys aren't trying to
meet me or anything so I don't see that fundemental situation changing anytime
soon (sigh).
I had to work (a Saturday -yuck) and didn't finish up in time to get dressed
up for my therapy session (non-gender therapy - yeh I'm so crazy I have two
therapy's now - a nongender therapy and a gender therapy - but both of them
have taken to calling me Stacy, so maybe I'm not so crazy after all) -the session
went well, but it's a lot more fun dressing up for therapy than showing up in
your work uniform and your boy mode. 
Anyways I did start the new year in a skirt (and dancing with a girl) so that's
a good start for the year.  It's Sunday morning so I have to get dolled up
and go to church, take care.