Transformative Honeymoons

Drag #6

4:44 am

Obviously I can’t sleep

I got a call last night when I was charging my phone

No one ever calls me at night, so why not charge my phone at 7pm?

I won’t use her name, but she left a message

She was being held in an institute,

the message was a phone number where she could be reached, visiting hours, 

she asked if I could call her

Obviously I did

She wasn’t sure who I was

 then she says “Oh. Stacy, of course”

She asks if it is Tuesday, unsure

The conversation is brief,

I first met her in group, she sat next to me

Showed me pictures of herself

A guy who managed a car dealership

And drove race cars on the weekend

He was muscular, good looking, weighed 225 pounds,

About what I weigh now

“so there is hope” I joked

I show her my pilot’s license

I just dress for fun I explain, which is sort of true

She is about 140 pounds and very pretty

She lives as a woman and passes, at least I think so

She not sure

She’s competitive and opinionated, and smart and  frustrating  

and  I know I kind of like her

She wants  to talk about how hard it is to transition, 

and ultimately manages to get asked to leave, 

making a comment about me in the process

Which kind of hurt,

So I remember meeting her, and knowing I kind of liked her

I was dressed up in a bar watching a drag show, when I saw her next

By the pool table with a friend – I thought about going over

But decided not to, I was afraid

I was at the Mall of America when I saw her next

I was in a very pretty outfit I bought at Macy’s and had on to go to a Job Fair

I was handing out my resume – I’m not full time, I’m not on hormones,

But I wanted to do this –it was scary walking in the door, but it went well

I was proud of myself and was now ready for lunch

I was sitting there eating, when she walked by and sat at a nearby table

I thought about it for about five minutes

Then casually walked over and said hi

We chatted, she was waiting for a friend, and she showed up

And sat with us, it was a very enjoyable chat and we exchanged numbers

She was starting a her new job, the pay wasn’t so good but it’s a job,

And I thought that was exciting, especially being able to go to work as a woman

I give her a lift to a clinic for the pre-employment drug test

At  the next job fair I went to I called and talked before I went in

It boosted my confidence

And of course she would remind me that I could always take the dress off

And get a job as a guy

I’m  looking for a job as a guy too I reminded her

But I really wanted to say at least I tried

She called me last Tuesday and asked what I was doing

I wanted to go to a blues jam, sign up and play my harmonica,

I would go dressed as a guy

It’s still too scary for me to let my musician friends know about this,

Even at a jam I’ve never been to there’ll be someone I know  casually

and then there are the drunks

I picked her up and she was dressed casually but she looked very pretty

Not that it was a date or anything, we’re just friends

We go in the bar and I sign up for the jam

I meet a musician I know slightly, and we talk, on his last CD

One of the guys on the CD  was a man when they started the CD

had a sex change and was a woman when it was completed ,

I couldn’t make this up

I sat with my “date”, chatted  

and waited  for my turn to play with the band

she gets up to get a drink, 

 at the bar,some guy approaches her,  

and when she orders A meal some guy approaches her

she’s very pretty and it’s not a date and stuff

but still I mean, I am dressed as a guy and everything

anyways I get up and play and take her home afterwards

and she has to get up early for work the next day

then Saturday I’ve asked a friend to go to a play with me

(I sometimes get tickets for next to nothing)

She’s not feeling well so I call  about going to the play

I get the machine and leave a message

I call again  she answers

She’s not on the lease, her partners moved out,she’s not on the lease

They want to evict her, the social worker is coming over and she has to

Stay in the apartment until she arrives

I go and  see a play and have a good time

I get a call Tuesday

I call back

“Today is Tuesday”  I say, helpfully