Transformative Honeymoons

I've made no secret of the fact that I'm out of work these days, and have
very little money and very soon am going to be in even worse shape
financially than normal - so I sat in church today, dressed as a guy, with a mixture
of discomfort and amusement as the Rev. quoted from Luke where
Jesus says follow me and a man says OK, but let me say goodbye to my family
but that's not good enough for Jesus it seems
another says OK but let me bury my father
 to which came the classic reply of let the dead bury their own dead,
of course the idea being that you leave everything behind and let God provide
for you,
now I don't know about you, but I have in my life been bankrupt and destitute and I've been
friendless, and I've been extremely depressed and I can tell you that from every one
of those experiences I have learned one thing - God does a really crappy job of
providing for people who are poor and in need - seriously God is worse than a
Republican when it comes to the helping the poor and everyone in America knows this.
Picture a "good" Christian - OK:
he's white, middle aged, reasonably well off, married, owns a home, hes got 30 extra
pounds around the middle, he's comfortable, he's male, he has a good job
-there's no way in Hell he's going to leave this behind and do God's work
 -he'd be effing crazy -I mean sure he can attend a charity function, or something
but I don't know any Christians who are unemployed and homeless and
completely dependent on God, and if I did I'd slip him a buck and walk discreetly
away like every other good Christian would -
Having said that, I did on a very personal level ultimately reach the conclusion that
this semi-transexual lifestyle I am living is what God is calling me to do (versus
killing myself or living in the closeted Hell of self-deception) and having accepted this,
 I find myself  as poor, jobless, friendless,  and scared shitless as anyone else in these
circumstances and as dependent on Faith and God as any other poor soul in a foxhole
 - and mean while the real Christians, the ones God is rewarding are
sitting down with a nice glass of wine around a warm fire, in their comfortable home
with the Lexus parked out front and the 3.5 photogenic children and I'm totally
envious -and why shouldn't I be?

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=C-GFqhCq2HA

Amen