so this is on the fly - anyways I did make it out to the Saloon
last night (A gay bar in Minneapolis that I've not been in) -
I was there for about 30 min and had two beers, and obviously
didn't meet any one -I'm starting to wonder again if maybe the
reason I have so much trouble meeting guys is that I'm really not
gay - I just honestly can't picture myself as being intimite with any
one but a guy, and well with the female mental thing I have- there's things
a guy could do that I think would be nice, but I'm serious,
is there some category of non-gay gay guy's that I might be a menber of.
Speaking of categorys I might be a member of I was on the TS
roadmap site and I read that about 1 in 1000 to 1 in 200 people in
the US are trans in some form (actually trying to live as the "other" gender
in some manner) -it's a good site with a lot of information:
http://www.tsroadmap.com/index.html
But with all the trouble I am having meeting guys in a bar I've decided that
I am going to try and look really nice and go to church that way the first
time I go out in public - my church would be pretty open to transgender
people, and while technically I am a cross-dresser not a trans person,
I would like to present myself seriously, and would not be out for any
sexual gratification or arousal - it is a matter of presenting myself in a
place of worship in a way congruent to how I should "be" at this point
in my life -even though it has been denied (as the Bible puts it and I take
literally -made in Gods image - both Man and Woman). So that's the
revised plan.
Leading to such practical difficulties as I have absolutely nothing to wear.
So I'm going to start ordering on-line an item every 2 weeks (every payday)
starting with:
Rago 6109 High WaistBrief Girdle, as recommended in Laura's Playground
for about $35.00 http://www.herroom.com/Rago-6109-High-Waist-Brief-Girdle.shtml
but that's kind of pretty, and it's affordable.
In case you are wondering - I'm 43 at the bust, 38 waist 42 hips, 5'10"
220 pounds but very toned, size 11 mens shoe (I know)
I'm thinking of padding 4" on the hips to 46" so en femme my measurements will be
44" bust, 36" waist 46" hips -big but not that unusually plus-sized I don't think.
I used this for sizing:
what God gave me ( and some of that is muscle (yuck)) but the bra is obviously
an important item, and that's what I'll be getting next - in a couple weeks
(this is going to take forever -hopefully I can find a real job and speed things up)
Well anyways, enough shop talk I have to go to work
Take Care,
Samantha
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