Saturday, June 18, 2011





This is my latest makeover over at Taaz.com, and actually I'm really
happy with this. I mean sure everyone else is making all this wonderful
progress on their transitions and the 18 year girls are beautiful, and lovely
and couldn't imagine what it's like to be in an effing closet for 30 years.
Whatever, of course I'm totally envious.

Yep, I'm totally stuck in my latest rut, and making no progress, and like
I say, I suck at being Gay, but a year ago I was 270# and stuck in that rut
of a dead end job which I finally just had to pull the plug on, and as totally
effed up as everything is now, I lost 50#, I'm healthy, I'm relatively sane
( ignore my ex gender therapist), and when I do find a job (which I will)
I can start buying some dresses and make-up and all that silly shit and go to
my monthly cross-dressers club (I couldn't make that up - I joined one) ,
and if I look like this, that would be OK.  Sure, you're looking at me
going "yuck", I'm ugly, I'm old, I'm fat, I'm poor, I'm lonely, I'm weird,
So What? I'm just playing the cards I've been dealt,
and I think this looks OK. Fuck it.

The Second image was an exercise to make a work in Bridget Riley's style,
but I started playing around and this is really cool looking, then a messed up
Cezanne exercise, then a Gainsborough exercise with my head pasted on,
I really suck at following directions too.


anyways, a couple reruns:




Take Care,

Samantha

Links to Samantha's full length Plays (which are not Transgender Themed,
but are pretty good (I think so at least) can be found here:

My first play "The Acts of Cain" which as I've said was never
produced, but I earned $7000 from it:
http://theactsofcain.blogspot.com/

My second play "Catfish Bones - A Love Song to the Blues"
along with some digital recordings:

http://catfishbones.blogspot.com/

And my efforts at a third play have stalled,
but it would be about Herbert "Berta" Beeson
a cross dressing tightwire performer with
Ringling Brothers and Sells-Floto who was a
headline act performing as a woman. This is
based on a true story, but like everyone else,
I will take dramatic liberties.
this is an odd mix of some ideas, some written
sketches and some historical information:

http://bertabeeson.blogspot.com/

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