I'm glad we can officially call this Winter

So those are my two official entries in Rachel's Haven's December Caption Contest.
I just did "Jeremy Dreams of Santa" this morning, but judging by the responses,
the bottom one is a lot more popular.  I like them both actually, but I don't
think the top one is really "in the spirit" of the competition -I mean everybody else
is taking a picture and writing a caption for it, and I'm taking a picture and duplicating
it to a new layer and desaturating the top layer and blending it to second layer,
using the history brush on the flesh selection with some color adjustments and then
using a couple artitstic filters and a contrast adjustment.....(I mean I'm cheating so
bad I'm ready for NASCAR).
The second one I just cut out the image put it on my "PinkSilk" background
and added text -it's nothing anybody else couldn't do, so that's fair. 
Judging by the responses, the gown was kind of popular, and Santa kind of bombed,
so that's what I get for cheating.

Every year in the Twin Cities around Christmas, a Russian Ballet group comes to town
and performs the Nutcracker.  For some reason I couldn't go last year, and we all know
why I'm not going this year (I was out applying for part-time jobs yesterday and today,
and one looks promising).  But since I couldn't go, I bought a DVD of the Bolshoi Ballet
1978 performance, started to watch it, paused it, and never finished.  So I'm going to
go ahead and watch it tonight, and if it's any good I'll do a DVD review as the next
post after the Chistmas Eve post.  Bailley's and Ballet! It sounds like fun.

I do have my Christmas Eve Caption finished ahead of time - which will suprise anyone
who knows me, but you'll just have to wait.  Happy Solistice - I'm glad we can
officially call this Winter now, considering there's like two feet of snow out there.

PS -not only did the Vikes lose, but it was so cloudy I couldn't see the Lunar Eclipse either,
well let me get it out of my system: Boo Bears! Boo! Yuck!

PPS- I saw an ad today for some TV show where Angelina is disguised as a man,
I was at the health club, and they don't close caption the ads - so that's all I know

The Princess of Punch

I actually did do some sparring in college, it was part of my "Oh! So Macho!"
phase.  I was pretty heavy into weightlifting and  I was actually quite strong.
I would have been a light-heavy, and the coach was training a guy for
Golden Gloves, and so I'd spar with him.  But because of all the conditioning
I was doing, Coach wouldn't let me near his pretty boy boxer until I'd been
on the bag for 15 to 20 minutes, by which time my knuckles were bloody,
and any pop I had in my punches was gone. It was all I could do to hold my
hands up while I got pummeled. It kind of sucked (in the bad way). It doesn't
hurt really, but it's not a lot of fun. However, it was really cool walking around
with black eyes all the time, especially since I hadn't actually hurt anyone. 

If I'd really thought it through (and obviously I hadn't), I would have realized
that I would have felt just terrible if I hurt the dear boy.

Can you imagine it, the Ref standing over the knocked out boxer
"One!....Two...."  and I'm rushing up going "Oh I'm so sorry,"
I mean really, would you want to watch that?

As I lose weight (almost 40 pounds now!) and gain conditioning, I'm kind of getting
some of this muscle back, and I'm trying to minimize it as much as possible.
but I can't help but thinking back to this and laugh, I mean "Oh, So Macho!"

Looking back on it, I probably should have cut my hair, because I had
long strawberry-blond hair hanging way over the shoulders - Very Macho!

I did the caption below for someone at Rachel's Haven, I'm doing a lot
fewer captions, but I'm spending a lot more time on the ones I do,
Quality not Quantity these days.  The story just came to me -so I only
spent about an hour on it (the boxing poster took about an hour too).

I plan on my next post on 12/24/10 wit a Christmas theme - 0% originality so far,
but that puts me in a corner - some times you just get pummelled in the corner,
but sometimes you come up with something good - we'll see.

PS -This blog is just over a month old, and there are a lot of first-time viewers.
By all means let me know what you think - with Jennifer out of the picture,
I'm getting zero feedback here. 

There are Good Days too

So I was at the dog park, following the vote on my cell, which is really amazing when
you think about it.  Don't Ask Don't Tell is buried -way cool!
all I can say is  "Oh, Very Exciting!"
I got home and checked my mail and I got confirmation that I passed my test
(well of course I passed silly, but it's official)
I started the day with an earache in my good ear, which is always a concern because
as an ex-musician, I've lost a lot of hearing, but let's be honest -it's the middle of
winter in Minnesota, and Sammie's got a little cold - I just need something to
worry about or this dingbat brain of mine will melt down -I'm fine,
For some reason I decided to go to a Saturday jam (I haven't
picked up my axe (my musical instrument) in months, but I grabbed my amp
and mic, and went out and played and saw some old friends and had a really,
really good time. So it took a while - but yeh, I do miss playing now,
I've got to get out and play more - It's fun again.
I was on the elliptical at the health club for an hour - it felt good, but like I said
I've got a little cold (I am so being  like my mother right now-oh I'll live dear.....)
I'm just as broke as I was yesterday, but I've been walking around with
a smile all day -some days are just good days.
So I had to post the Transformative Honeymoons Repeal of Don't Ask Don't Tell,
and I'm going to pour myself a Bailey's on ice, pop "Meet me in St Louis"
in the DVD, and brush my dog while I watch a movie.
"Good Night John Boy!"

PS - Fictionmania is a very cool site, thanks for listing Trans-Honey

PPS - you know I can still remember back in the day when you could make
a caption like the one below, those days are over.

A Hat Trick!

Anyways, I've posted the bottom two images on this blog previously, but the top image
is about ten minutes old.  I thought I'd group them together and try to explain what
this fascination with figure skating transvestites is all about.

It goes back to High School, when I was an extremely good defenseman.  Now,
I now you're having a hard time picturing this, but it's true - I was out there playing
first or second string defense on all-star teams, I had a wicked slapshot from the
blue line, a very accurate backhand, and I was really good at checking boys right
on their butts.  But I wasn't really good enough to get a college scholarship,
and I didn't have any interest in pursuing this past high school. But my father sure did.
So yeh, in his infinite wisdom, he decided that I needed to take figure skating lessons
to become a better hockey player.  In his defense, his heart is in the right place,
and it is not as totally daft as it might sound at first - figure skaters are technically
much better skaters than hockey players, there is a lot of edge control that tranfers
over, the coach he picked and his wife were renowned in figure skating - it did make
me a much better skater. But  picture this from my perspective -I'm in this class and
I'm dressed in stinky smelly hockey pants (after a month or so when I started doing
jumps and spins I got to just wear jeans and a hockey jersey) I skate out there
with my ugly back figure skates with the little points on the toes, which I stumble
over all the time until I get used to them, OK, now picture the other girls in their
cute little figure skating outfits with the danskins pantyhose, the cute lttle jackets
and mittens, and OK you get the picture - this is pure torture - I mean waterboard
me all ready - and my father could not for the life of him figure out why I hated these
lessons so much - I wanted my own cute little figure skating outfit!!  I actually did
get to the pont where I was doing some double jumps, and performed in a comedy
act in an amateur performance, so it's something to be proud of , but at the time,
you have no idea what it was like.  So that's the inspiration for the poster.


The caption is based on a comment Playin Petra made about a Gordie Howe
hat trick being a Goal, an Assist, and a Fight, so an Ice Girl hat trick must be a hug,
a kiss, and  trip to the locker room with a guy after the game. I couldn't resist
using the ice girl "hat trick" reference in a caption. A real hat trick is of
course three goals in a game, I've done that, but not too often.

On an unrelated matter, I was at the Walmart yesterday, and I picked up a copy of
"My Fair Lady".  The Cashier asked me if I needed a gift receipt and I, of course
said no, so she smiled and winked at me - so heads up, if you buy a copy of
"My Fair Lady" and don't ask for a gift receipt the cashier may think you're Gay.
I'm going to watch it as soon as I post this.

I've got my tuition paid off for next Semester! It's going to be tough, but I'm not
going in debt this time around -and never again - I can flip off Visa and the
Depatment of Education with pride.

PS -Thanks World of TG for including me in your list.

Samantha Smarty Pants

So I got done with my last test today -I did really good, like 4.0
straight A's really good. Go ahead and make fun of Samantha
smarty pants, I don't care. I'm really happy.  I had to drive to
St Paul for this test, and they mail the results, but it's a state test
that is pass/fail, and of course being Samantha smarty pants,
I'm trying to get 100%. I could have not even bothered to answer
the last 10 questions and still passed. But then they would have
thought I was just some dumb boy (yuck!). 
[you boys know I'm kidding, guys are very non-yucky]. 

So I'm done with classes until next semester starts.
The folks here at Trans-Honey are congratulating me by saying:
"Smart and Sexy, now there's a dangerous combination" , so true.

I was up last night worrying about this test, and of course I had to
poke around the Internet at 3 in morning, and take the dog out,
and try to get some more studying in, and worry, but I'm done with test
jitters for a while - I have no reason why I worry before a test, but
it happens.

I hadn't planned on posting today - I wanted to make a special caption
for my preferences section at Rachel's Haven, but my last post was
such an absolute disaster for traffic, that I figured I better paper it
over before I lose anyone still left.  I'm sorry - I'm new at this.
I thought the posters were kind of cool (oops!)

The "caption" I'm posting today is of course referencing the
Fats Waller song lyrics:
Aint misbehavin, I'm saving all my love for you,
but I'm playing on it like it's a beauty pageant award
"miss behaving" which would be someone being too good.
It's main function in the folder is to look really cool -I think
it succeeds.

If you join Rachel's Haven, after you've jumped through some
hoops, you get a trading folder, and then you can trade captions
with other people there - which is fun -that of course is were I got
introduced to Jennifer (more later) and going back to October 25,
2010 (it seems like yesterday) would be the date I joined, which
is really the day Samantha1 was born - so this creature that I am
has really not been around very long and I'm going to make mistakes.

So that other people know what kind of captions you like in your
trading Folder,  you list your preferences for captions -I've changed
mine about 8 times now, but that is a cool picture (I did it this afternoon
in about 40 minutes). So it'll be posted at Rachel's Haven -stop by and
say hi!

Oh I almost forgot -I added my profile to this site while I was up
worrying about the silly test.

I'm planning on what I'm hoping is a super-sexy caption for Jennifer,
but I really want to keep that warning screen off my blog -so I'm
going to post that one at Rachel's Haven -it'll be a little to risque
for this site, but if you are a member you can see it for yourself.

PS - Vikes? never heard of them (We are so bad right now it hurts
to watch)

No Vikes! Special Poster Edition

No Vikes!
If you read my last post, there really was a Blizzard here,
and I guess the Vikes aren't playing today.
the Metrodome inflatable roof is down.

Well hopefully that means some of you boys have some
free time on your hands, let's see, hmmmm, I know how
about a special poster edition so here's goes
a collection of  15 Transformative Honeymoons Posters
(there are way too many to post all of them here)

and a special bonus "offer"
I really liked this next poster,

Anyways, normally I'd be saying Go Vikes! here on Sunday, 
at this time, but today it's No Vikes!

I've really got to study for a really important test on Tuesday,
so next week sometime, OK?

PS- check out my sunglasses!

How to Survive A Blizzard

How to Survive a Blizzard,

by Samantha1

So last night and going into sometime this weekend, up here in Minnesota,
we’re being hit with a major blizzard,  and I thought, as a
PSA (Public Service Announcement) I’d give some an actual description of
How to Survive a Blizzard, in case you ever find yourself in similar
circumstances.

So of course, the first step is to dress really warm –I’m talking long johns,
jeans, two pairs of sox, hiking  boots, a shirt, a light down windbreaker,
the Pillsbury Doughboy snowpants (it’s like an insulated one-piece overalls
you wear over your pants and coat –and yes you look really, really fat in it,
but so does everybody else), then a winter coat you wear over this, a good
warm hat, warm gloves, and of course sunglasses (I’ll talk more about
sunglasses later). 

You are now ready to venture outside. 

Take a walk  around the house.  Make sure no tree is about to crash through
the roof or anything. Everything is Cool? Good, now you have to shovel or
snow blow the driveway.  Either way you are going to get very wet from the
snow, you are going to work up a sweat from the physical effort, and the
wind and cold and wetness can cause frostbite –but you are dressed for it –
take your time, look around, it really is kind of pretty.  Watch your stupid dog
frolic in the snow because she’s too dumb to realize she’s in a blizzard. 
Remember you are not going anywhere until they plow the streets, and driving
anywhere right now is a very high risk activity.  So I 'll say it again,  take your
time. Nice and steady.  In an hour or so you’ve got the driveway open – you
can get out if you have to but don’t, take a walk instead.

Get your stupid dog (who still hasn’t figure out a Blizzard is serious business)
and take a walk around.  There will be some guys out blowing their driveways.
Smile, wave, say Hi, say the dumbest thing you can come up with like:

“Boy, it sure did snow a lot!”

it’s OK, you’re walking your dog in a freaking blizzard ,
They know you’re not Albert Einstein. 

Walk a couple blocks to the local convenience store. Get a saugage and
cheese croissant (yeh the dog is going to get more of it than I will) get a
hot chai tea latte (mmm, not real Chai Tea (MMM!!!) but still mmm) look
at the sunglasses, try out a couple pairs.  Pick something nice, check that
it doesn’t say “tres-girly” or something that would make it too embarrassing
to wear, but no, these are just nice, they flatter my face.  So go pay for it. 
Talk to the Cashier about the snow.  She’s not rushed today, no ones around,
so she talks about the sunglasses.  She thinks they look nice too. You talk
about how you are always breaking yours, she talks about a really nice pair
she got from her mom and then lost (sigh)-she seems like a really nice person,
but it’s back to the blizzard for me, and I feed my puppy my croissant, sip
from the snow covered lid of my warm Chai Tea (mmm, OK, under the
circumstances MMM!!!) pick up my dog’s poop in a plastic bag and stick it in 
my coat pocket. I Smile and wave to a guy on the way back, wearing my
new $12.99 (but not cheap) sunglasses (oh, very nice!)
and walk back home, where I am going to hole up in my room
for a good long spell.

And that is how to survive a blizzard, it’s really not as bad as it may sound.

PS -I just wrote this this morning, and I'm kind of proud of it - sorry there's
no captions, but next time, I make up for that.